Crap. I'm getting old. In two days I'll be 30. How in the hell did that happen. Seriously, I don't get it. I'm still sometimes surprised I'm old enough to drive. I'm totally an adult...and I don't like it. I have a full time job, a car payment, rent, a cat I have kept alive for months...and I'm almost 30. But here's the really funny part - it doesn't really bother me.
A year or so ago, the thought of turning 30 terrified me. I now realize it wasn't so much the getting old, it was what I haven't done with my life. Now, honestly, I haven't done that much since then, but I am so much happier. There'll always be stress and crappy weeks (this is one of them) but overall I don't think I've ever been this happy. Maybe when I was 8. that was a really good age...
I don't know exactly what the change is. I know the boy is a contributing factor, as is graduating, but I don't think that's it. Maybe it's just that I've come to realize things about myself. I've heard that as you get older you become more comfortable in your skin. I think I was comfortable before but certain people had convinced me of certain things that just aren't true about me. I now know these things aren't true and I guess I can relax a little. It's really nice as I reach this "milestone" age in my life to realize that I actually like myself.
